I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
