Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize