I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
We have started to decorate penises.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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