The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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