Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Actions speak louder than pants.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
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