can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
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