hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Randomize
