Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Randomize
