I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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