YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Randomize
