never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
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