please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
