nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize