i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Randomize
