I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize