I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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