we're blogging at a bar
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Welp...herpes.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Randomize
