This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
