He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
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