Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize
