Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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