Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
i barfeds in our rink
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
