Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
