I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
