At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
