i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
He better not be in your backpack
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize