no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
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