so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
