remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
