a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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