I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Randomize
