whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
