i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
How's work?
Spinning.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Randomize
