Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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