There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
In America we eat man semen.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Randomize
