Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Randomize
