Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
