I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize
