in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
I did not marry a roomba.
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