whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Randomize
