i think my mom watched the whole time
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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