Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Randomize
