what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
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