I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
