How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Come share oat with me in your robe
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize