Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
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