you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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