I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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