And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
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