Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
how do you play pong handcuffed?
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Randomize
