At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
NoShamevember. You game?
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
