I'm sorry my penis didn't work
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Randomize
